changing my water brand to krogers reverse osmosis drinking water. it has no brain zapping floride in it, lol.

feeling much better now. i've had a headache all day and all last night. i dreamt i was on the road driving and then riding on a bus, i met someone who owned a cookie store. my mother was with me and not feeling well but doing ok. it was an interesting dream altogether, a good dream. the past couple of days i've been having dreams that weren't so great. anyway, that's about it for this report. until later -

lately i've been getting hungry late at night, like around eight or nine. the kitchen is usually closed at that time. but last night i went in to get a pop tart. i guess i shouldn't have done that. i'm not really supposed to be eating pop tarts anyway. i have a slight headache this morning. i haven't taken any asprin yet. i can hear birds chirping outside. i'm more concerned with the dream i had this morning and the pop tart.

it's later in the day, 4pm. my laundry will be done in about 30 minutes. i just took a shower. it's warm out and balmy in my room. i have beach wear on. my air conditioner and fan aren't working that well. luckily i found another fan i could use. i have it on. i made some paper art, orbs. it's sort of a macrame paper art swinging tassel. it's more of a toy. i don't have anything new to report since this morning really. i've made a shopping list. it's short. i put up a new picture on my cork board and changed out the pictures in my picture frames. they look very pretty. i also gave someone their birthday present early. it was a dress i had found for ten dollars, a striped pink t-shirt, and some shoes that i found at a goodwill store. i cleaned them and added some glitter. i think a couple of people in the household are going to a dance they have at school. i think it's the first one of the year, i think someone said it was the homecoming dance. i hope they have a nice time. i'm sure they will.  that's about it for this afternoon. i'm just waiting for the late afternoon heat to go down and for the cool breezes of the early evening to roll in.

today's saturday. i'm getting a headache. yesterday i had some pasta for breakfast. i think that's where it's coming from. i found some information that i was looking for. i'll have to write off to someone's relative to find information further. i also found a vacuum cleaner. it's 65 dollars and i thought i'd do that and pay my car insurance. i should have enough left over for a socket wrench if i need one. i may already have a socket wrench in with my car stuff. i'll have to check and see. it's a pretty boring day today, not much to do. i fumigated the car yesterday. i think it worked pretty well. i went and got a burrito last night, maybe that's where the headache is coming from, idk. i was not stung by anything that i could notice. i'm trying to figure out how to get down into the air vents. they're pretty long. i may have to make a make-shift tool. i'm not sure if i can do that. i watched some videos which showed how to get into the dash board and the air unit. they were helpful. the air conditioning system consists of three or four main components, a condenser, a compressor, and an evaporator. it's mainly the evaporator which needs to be cleaned out, as well as where the fan is..that may be where the compressor is. i'd like to clean out the whole system. it was recommended that i disengage the battery, set the parking break, and detach the air bags before removing the whole dash board. i'll need either a seven or a ten millimeter socket wrench and a special tool for prying. it should be interesting to try and take it all off. i'm not doing that without a good vacuum cleaner that uses vacuum bags.
i hope it all goes well. i don't know yet how to get under the heat shield. maybe i can find a video on it.

the brown window spider . . .


the brown widow spider is both an invasive creature and very aggressive. here in the south they grow to mammoth proportions. last year about this time i was bitten by a brown widow spider the size of my hand extended. it was no joke. it had crawled into my body while i was sleeping. i had one in my ear and i won't say where the other one was. i can tell you that one or both of them were protecting it's babies. i had gone to the emergency room because i had something coming out of the air vents, stinging me. it was september and i guess time for spiders to hatch. i recently fumigated my car again, just today. and i will be taking my car to a technition to have the air unit vaccumed out or else do it myself. at the hospital they didn't believe me when i came in and they sent me off to a special hospital because they thought that i was suffering from spider phobia. i was not suffering from spider phobia. they were unfamiliar with the brown widow spider. i like to think that if i had gone to a hospital further down south or in florida they might have more believed me and they might have been more aware of the invasive species. there are specialist in baton rouge. as a result of sending me to the special hospital for patients with mental conditions the spider remained in my body for about two weeks before i was able to finally squash it and it fell out. it was a very tramatizing experience. when i had first arrived at the special hospital they had actually offered me spider spray because i had seen a brown recluse in the room. i don't know why i didn't think to use it on myself. i just wasn't sure what the spider would do, which way it would crawl. luckily i did figure it out and it did fall out after putting up with it for two weeks. i never again want to live in a home that is infested with spiders. i've looked at a couple of apartments. there is one that is govt sponsored and they take good care of the property. there are no over hanging trees and they change out the carpet and the ceiling fans every time someone moves out. one of the other apartment complexes was riddled with spider webs on the outside of the buildings, the rent was cheeper, but i won't be staying there.  

living now in the days of the tribulation, there are spiders in my car and wolves just across the street. they had gotten in my car when the window was rolled down and left overnight that way in my garage and had also gotten in through the heat shield underneath the hood and into the air conditioning unit. i'll have to fumigate the car again, in under the dash, the seats, and in the air vents. last night something was stinging me from under the dash board where the peddle and break are. as far as the wolves go, or coyotes, whatever they are, they have placed some moth balls in front of the fence where they had gotten in before, and placed a large barrel in front and closed it with wire up top. i think its keeping them out of the back yard. we have alot of cats here. they like cats. i hope i can solve the spider situation. i'm using raid room fogger, several of them.

today's another day. i had ice cream for dinner, l o l, and a salad for breakfast. i don't know what i'll be doing later. prob watch t.v. the temperature is climbing now, only to 89. so it's not as hot today. it's been that way all week now, which is good. today's thursday. tomorrow will be friday and i get paid next week. i had thought i would get some software. but i d k, i might just send off for a kit of some sort. i would like to get that started a s a p. that's about it for my report today.

its the end of the day. didn't do much today but more than in the past few days. that's about it. tired again. maybe they'll be something good for breakfast tomorrow.

a little tired today. i took some vitamin c pills. that should help. other than that i don't have much going on.

there's a guardian angel and he knows not of it's lead. they keep them safe from dark corners that can well weep when they don't see. an angel's bow is in their lock and a step goes with their spring, and a mightly large and awesome thing can also be set upon a swing. if clouds do come they'll be for knot because of angel's wings. quick is her toe and careful plot is kept upon her strings.  

how do you explain things sometimes? often times for me i find it difficult. but its all there. its in my mind. i can see it clearly. but how do i express it to other people or in a blog post. sometimes i think it's simpler just to not to, l o l. and at that i think i'll leave it at that.  

i dream i lived another life. i was moving from one house to another and its was interesting all the different things i had that i recognized, such as melamine dinner wear and jewelry collectibles. my new home had all its proper lighting. it seemed to be mostly white with several rooms. and it was comfortable.

the isle of saint recia . . .

i'm on vacation at the isle of saint recia. not many have heard about it. it's not the usual isle surrounded by water or white sandy beaches. but its a very nice island. i could tell you alittle bit about the patroned saint the island was named after. they've been known to take people in who either have no home or no motherly direction, it's an island for those who have been tossed aside. on the island there is an island home and in it it's properly dressed with all the adornments of basic needs and things pertaining to the well being of the soul.
i've been staying here for a while. it's been nice. no one bothers me and there is always advicement available. and there is always something good cooking on the stove. the isle of saint recia's isn't really an island at all, though it is. and the care takers are blessed people who have been there for countless numbers of people, one of which is me and those that i'm attached to.  they are studious and wonderfully normal and keep everyone safe on their island. i'm glad to be staying at this island. this island is sound and sturdy and i've been
so appreciative of the caretakers. they've taken good care of the vacationers. l o l.

took a shower. feeling better. and i'm enjoying the cool temps of the morning.

its seven am. i've been up all night. the headaches seem to be gone mostly. and, l o l, i'm still left wondering if anyone showed up at the saint james hotel lobby looking for someone at eight o'clock sharp. i'm pretty sure that if they didn't show up there, they at least thought about it. honestly i would have been there if i could've been. but...

today is a lazy day. im not doing much. i dont really have anything to report on either. feeling alittle tired. thats all.

today i have an appointment at 1. i took a shower and did some laundry. that's about it.

ths pills have taken effect. i've taken a nap. there is a thunderstorm rolling in. the lights may go out but the netbook will still be on.  l o l

i took some more headache pills. they are working.i don't know for how much longer i will need them. i have several now so they may last. just hanging out online today otherwise.

the wolves got into the back yard yestarday. someone did some research as to how to detur them. they read that they don;t like moth balls and ammonia. isn't that funny. so they have  a whole trashcan full of mothballs right at the fence. the main problem is that the gate doesn't always close securly. that problem needs to be fixed. i  the meantime they have the trash  can rigged in front of it,  l o l, i wonder if that will work.

am up. it's late. i have insomnia. i took two more pills. hopefully they will work before too long and i'll be back asleep again before to long. am tired. the temperature is cold again. i have the fan on. thats about it.

feeling better. i'll have to keep taking pills, l o l. i was able to rest a little. i should prob try to go back to sleep though. i'll check back here later.

headache came back. i took another pill. i think its working. am very tired.

i'm waiting to get back an email for an address to write to. i'm really looking forward to getting that information. if they don't answer back i'll have to send another message.

feeling better. just had some spaghetti and a glass of milk. it feels like the headache's almost all gone. i don't know if it will be returning. i haven't gone by the pharmacy yet. i may go in a bit.

still have a trace end of a head ache. it's switching sides. i went to the doctors office agian this morning for a generic. they gave me something without caffine. i think that'll be good. i'm hoping it doesn't get worse.temp is getting warmer but is ok. i'll check back in here again later.

feeling better. its 2am.

need sunglasses. is later in day. still feeling aweful. generally no headache but affected by caffine in headache pill. its cooler now outside and inside. am really tired.

not feeling to great today. i'm drugged out on a headache pill with caffine in it. it's giving me mood swings and i'm greatly tired. i haven't slept in three days. i have three more days to go with this headache and caffine pills. l o l.

a person named john

i once met someone by the name of john. things that i noticed about them..that they were very defensive, and also somewhat sophisticated. they seemed to be rather honest and they also seemed to say inappropriate things at inappropriate times. they were the uncle of someone that i knew. and i can recall them saying something about them, a couple of things. that's about it. i gave them my name and my number and they called a couple of times. i was never home. they were much older than i was, at least by 20 years or more.
my mother did not want me going out with them because they were interested in them and in fact i became involved with someone my last year of highschool because of two reasons. one, someone whom i was arrainged with tried to set me up with them and two my mother had allowed me to stay for a week with them in order that i would get pregnant. she apologized for it years later. isn't that interesting.

hello. it's another day. i thought i'd try writing a short story again. we were riding on a train. where were we going? to the millennial. its a future trip to the past. or maybe its to the future, a future millennium. that's it! it's a future millennium. what's in a future millennium? the past is there, and so is a present tense..as well there is the future in a future millennium. it's interesting. we're on a hyper-train. that's what they call it. what future city are we traveling through? i think it's called the party city. i don't know that that's its official name. what do the people look like in a future millennial? weird. l o l. just weird. sort of strange looking. i'm looking at a man dressed in high healed boots and a sort of a jumpsuit. it's tailored. so it looks nice, but don't ask me to describe him further. trust me, you might not want to know. there's a young girl sitting to the left of me. they must all like jumpsuits here.  she has a mark on her arm. it's red and in the shape of a circle. i suppose that denotes something of some importance. i wonder what. maybe it's the sign of the red dwarfed sun. the bianary sun to our own, the birth place of past earth life, a whole history of things transpiring across millenniums maybe on trains. i wonder about trains of the past. they must have been from the future as well.
can you imagine whole cities of a futuristic look but all in the past. i can. i sit and ponder next to the picture window just there beside me. i look out the window. it looks like south america, but new somehow, alot of colors and a mishmosh of different signs and plant life. you might think there weren't gardens i  a new millennium, but apparently they've kept them. they have grand trees and things of what seems to be all sorts of diversities. most of all i like all the colors. i keep hearing something which is like a sine wave. there must be some reason behind it. it must be a sort of general overall public health thing. sine waves produce certain brain waves patterns to light up when you hear them. i'm glad to see they are developing those types of sines.
what else is going on in the story? where do you think we are going? to a sine wave park. a whole park dedicated to brain wave patterns. it ought to be interesting, and prob relaxing. we stop. i step off the train. i look around at the other passengers there. they're all dressed in fashionable jump suits of sorts. i feel kind of odd in what i'm wearing. i can pick up a jumpsuit while i'm here though. maybe i'll find one in pink. the park is very green. beside me is a grand tall tree. there is an exspansive canopy. so i'm standing under this giant exspanse and someone sais, ''i'm sorry mam, can you tell me the time.'' i look at my watch. it's nearly midnight. ''it's late,'' i say. they say thank you and walk off toward a park bench nearby.  should i venture out into this wild and unknown parkway?  i wonder where the sine waves are. they must be sighlent and subluminal.  i walk toward the middle of an open field of flowers. they look like a type of irrecandesent miniature gladiola, a whole group of them under my feet. i take my shoes off and walk among the flowers. it just seemed something to do. i blink and i wake up. i look over to my right and the night is dark. i'm still on the train. and we're heading to rio.    

we all exist on planes of lights. it's the key to how we see things.

so, i had my V8 this morning. somehow i think it's more appropriate to type here. i made one of those video pages where you can video log yourself, but i think this is prob a better venue.

i look totaly different. lol.

i think i'll go do some make up. it's pretty cool right now indoors. in fact i had to turn the air and fan off. it was too cold, lol. oh well. i'll have to turn it back on later.

well it looks pretty good. its framed nicely. maybe i could cut hair for a living, lol.

i think i'll get busy on a hair wig. bbl

im being pretty good about taking my meds. i'm currently taking zaprasidone 60 milligrams once a day and buspirone 30 milligrams twice a day. they seem to work pretty well. the hydrocloride is helping with a condition i was having with my central nervious system, it affected my whole body, kind of like malaria will do, but not. i was getting a wierd shake in my body coming from the central part of my nervious system, that's dissapated. however i have to continue taking it. i read that hydrocloride tablets are used on viruses. i had a virus in my body. it was affecting my head and my inner ear as well.

i got some denims from the store, and a t-shirt  it looks pretty comfortable.  i guess i'll just type here all day when thoughts pervay me. i also found some fun shoes at the goodwill store. they were four dollars. that's fine for just wearing a fun pair of shoes around the house. they're high heals. i can't walk in them, lol.

it's 2:30am.

i think i'm done posting for now.

thats a nice song. i logged out of the room. they're telling stories. i haven't heard that one in a long while. it's a station from new york. it's really cold in here now, earlier it was really hot outside.

its cold in here now.

  

                                                                                                                                                                         lights. i looked out my window and i saw lights. was i about to be transformed into the fifth dimension?

i had never seen a sceene such as this. ten penicles stretched out across the sun in the clouds. the window was big so it remained in my inclination for more than a minute. i took a photo. i'll never see a sky like that again. there against the dark foreground, the heavens just stood out.

                                                                                                                                                                          there was a train car in the sea. it lept its way there via wheels which served as flippers, and it's conductor wore fins. what was it doing there? was it resting? was it swimming? was it floating? maybe it was traveling. where to? to the sea? to the ocean? maybe to a pond? it was traveling to the sea, but it was going no where and it was not floating. it couldn't swim so it just sat there getting a tan. half in the sea and half on the shore..what was it doing being so quiet and aloof. was it really all that aloof? how could one miss a train car half in the sea? did it have any passengers? i think it did, fish. fish people floated in and out of it's submerged deapths. it was poetic.

                                                                                                                                                                        once upon a time there was a late night train. it rolled through the city like frieghts with wieghts. the city wasn't a large city. it was about mid sized, large enough to explore one midnight, small enough to not get lost.
it reminds me of seattle..but we're not in seattle. we're in a city with no name. it has a name but we're not naming names. it's late out, 1 am. there's a hat resting there upon a seat which someone had left. if it were right it would take a right right to the left of a women sitting right next to it. i don't believe it's her hat though. it's a gentleman's hat. the lights of the train rail way go in and out. flashes of scenery go by. the quiet roar of the train mimics the rhythem of a train. it's an electric railway. if it were any other it would be a new century train with train tracks which were relatively new but older. the hat rivets back and forthe until it falls off the seat. the end.

i think i might take a break from typing. i typed alot earlier in the day.

thats really live. i think that's unusual. i wish glens room were on. there's no telling when he'll be on. idk. i'll just have to catch it when i catch it. i'm feeling kind of bad, although i took a headache pill. i went to the hospital last week and got a new prescription. i've been getting migrains lately. i usually don't get headaches, unless i'm really ill. i have been lately. anyway. i'm not sure how late i'll be up.

finally i figured out how to access my page. i had to cancel my automatic log in first. i don't really have anything to type about really. just passing some time. they say when you don't know what to write about to write about that, but just to keep on typing. it keeps the thought process going. i could use some coffee, but i don't drink coffee, i don't like it really. they are playing some 80s music on a radio show i'm logged into. i like 80s music. anyway. i guess i'm not using spacing properly, lol. i took a headache pill earlier. it will keep me up a while. i wonder how long they will be on. they are playing Inxs. maybe i'll get back to this later.

it's hot out. it's prob approaching 105.

well, looks like i have a new blog. i couldn't access my old one so i'll be making a new one here. i think it will be nice to read. what should i post first? it may take me a while to figure out how to post pictures here. i'm using a netbook.